In a show of Ford Nation’s
blindess loyalty, Rob Ford still has more-or-less the same approval rating as before he became the world’s most talked about alleged crack smoker. His supporters run the gamut from tepid defenders, like Doug Holyday, to raving apologists, broadcasting their fealty on Twitter and in comment sections. Here, a representative sample of the rationalizations, from more-or-less plausible through to cuckoo-bananas.
1) “Videos can be faked.”
Deputy mayor Doug Holyday is in a tough spot because he supports Ford but also isn’t a moron. Thus, his take: he believes the Toronto Star’s Robyn Doolittle saw a video, but wonders “whether the tape is authentic or not.” But would three separate reporters really be fooled by a low-budget fake?
2) “No, really, this is how you would fake a video.”
Youtube user Justin Jimmo went the extra mile for the crack-truther brigade, making his own fake Rob Ford crack video to show how it could be done. There are, clearly, a bunch of problems with this, not least that getting Ford’s voice right would take a lot of work.
3) “The Toronto Star is behind it.”
Toronto Star is trashy paper! Leave Rob Ford alone you scum! Focus your stories on crook politicians who stole your taxes to snort cocaine!
— Monti (@FemaleMonti) May 17, 2013
4) “The Provincial Liberals are behind it.”
Doug Ford told the Toronto Sun’s Sue-Ann Levy that the Star published the crack allegations as a way to take the heat off premier Kathleen Wynne (and not because it was scooped by Gawker). Levy herself has theorized that the Toronto Catholic District School Board fired Ford from his coaching gig under provincial pressure.
5) “This is all because he’s fat.”
Does all this attention on Ford, crack or no crack, have something to do with his weight?
— Jerry Agar (@jerryagar1010) May 29, 2013
6) “None of this matters la la la la I can’t hear you.”
Finally, there are those who straight up don’t care if the allegations are true. (As Doug Ford said in 2010, “Rob could commit murder on the steps of city hall and they would still vote for him.”) This group includes Agar, as well as this charming individual from the brain trust that is Twitter:
Can we leave Rob Ford alone? I don't care if he's a crack head or a rapist, he wants the city to grow and doesn't waste money or time!
— Peter Allegro (@PeterAllegro) May 17, 2013