1. DIAL “F” FOR FAKE PROM
Exorcise memories of bad hair, ill-conceived dresses and Neanderthal dates at this annual dance party. It’s much better than an academically sanctioned prom, thanks to the freely flowing booze. With a film noir theme, this year's event features local cover band The Best, a couples’ photo area and the crowning of a king and queen. Aug. 28. $15. Palais Royale, 1601 Lake Shore Blvd. W., fakeprom.com.

2. THIS AIN’T NO STRAWBERRY SOCIAL (FREE!)
The Press Club (the bar, not the journalistic institution) plays host to a new regular evening of art and music. DJ Peachy Keen takes care of the tunes, spinning retro and indie pop hits, and displays of work by west-end painters and photographers have the art side covered. After a circuit around the showroom, grab a beer (there are seven on draft and 45 bottles to choose from) and chill out on the back patio. Aug. 28. Press Club, 850 Dundas St. W., 416-364-7183.

3. 8 GIRLS WITHOUT BOYFRIENDS
Let’s agree to call this four-night production “interdisciplinary.” We think it’s a fitting descriptor; the self-described reluctant cabaret combines theatre, burlesque, slam poetry, performance art, stand-up, country and dance music and even thesis presentation. The play tackles stereotypes of single girls and issues affecting today’s “young and modern” women. Aug. 27 to 30. $15. Bread and Circus, 299 Augusta Ave., 416-336-3399, nobodysbusiness.ca/8girls.

4. BILL CLINTON
It isn’t often the CNE is treated to a dose of controversy, but that’s what happened earlier this month when news broke that the fair’s organizers are paying Bill Clinton to speak at this year’s event (the topic: “embracing our common humanity”) using tourism stimulus funds from the feds. We can’t really blame them, though, since it’s all an attempt to bring back The Ex’s glory days, when rock stars (Rolling Stones, the Jackson Five, David Bowie), movie royalty and even real royalty were in attendance. Aug. 29. $20–$50. BMO Field, 170 Princes Blvd., 416-870-8000, ticketmaster.ca.

5. JONAS BROTHERS
While they’ve never been solely a Disney Channel act, we figure the Jo Bros owe at least 75 per cent of their fame to the media juggernaut; their TV premiere was on Hannah Montana, followed by a starring role in the High School Musical wannabe Camp Rock, followed by a sitcom of their own, Jonas. Scoring tickets for the kids to this Sunday’s show should be worth at least two room cleanings and a car wash, and anyway, “Lovebug” is surprisingly catchy. Aug. 30. $15.50–$95.50. Rogers Centre, 1 Blue Jays Way, 416-870-8000, ticketmaster.ca.

6. UNDERWEAR AFFAIR TORONTO (FREE!)
Raising awareness for “cancers where the sun don’t shine,” this fundraiser for the North York General Hospital cancer centre hopes to fight not just cancers that strike below the belt, but also the fear and embarrassment that leave people reluctant to be screened for them. Get decked out in a crazy costume (underwear-only getups are encouraged but not required) and take part in the 5K walk or 10K run. Be sure to stick around until the last runner crosses the finish line; that’s when the after party kicks off. Aug. 29. Woodbine Park (at Coxwell and Lake Shore Blvd. E.), 416-777-2873, uncoverthecure.org.

7. VIRGIN FESTIVAL
This massive music fest was temporarily relocated to Burl’s Creek Park in Oro, Ontario, from the Toronto Islands, but sluggish ticket sales prompted organizers to rethink the venue. The move back to the city is good news for those who like headliners Ben Harper and Relentless7, Nine Inch Nails and The Pixies, but aren’t down with pitching a tent and lining up for the Port-a-Potties. Also on the bill: Grizzly Bear, Our Lady Peace, NERD, Thunderheist, Franz Ferdinand and Sean Kingston. Aug. 29 and 30. One day $39.50–$59.50; weekend pass $99. Molson Amphitheatre, 909 Lake Shore Blvd. W., 416-870-8000, ticketmaster.ca.

8. FAN EXPO CANADA
Canada’s version of Comic-Con, the famed California comic book convention, this weekend-long event draws fans with special guests, autograph signings, workshops and competitions. Look out for original Terminator star Linda Hamilton, B-movie behemoth Bruce Campbell and possibly some even bigger names—actors from Star Trek (Leonard Nimoy) and Heroes (James Kyson Lee) will be in town. Aug. 28 to 30. $25–$45. Metro Toronto Convention Centre, 416-241-7827, hobbystar.com/fanexpo.

9. BUSKERFEST (FREE!)
The street performance extravaganza celebrates its 10th anniversary this year. Get up close and personal with dozens of the world’s top musicians, mimes and magicians, including Aussie acrobats Popeyed; Japan’s Masaji Candyman, who can mould an ordinary blob of candy into delicate dragons, phoenixes and unicorns; and a slew of local talent. All donations benefit Epilepsy Toronto. Aug. 27 to 30. Front and Church Streets, torontobuskerfest.com.