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Serial Kilters
Investigating Canada’s worst decor offenders for their new HGTV show, Home Heist, Scotland’s campiest design duo find a little more plaid than they bargained for. On set in a Whitby atrocity with Colin and Justin By Liz Allemang
Scot free: Colin and Justin brave our indigenous design horrors and unfortunate love of hockey memorabilia
Image credit: Courtesy HGTV
What’s the deal with this house?
Colin: Every house that we’ve gone to in Canada so far has committed a very different
design crime. This particular house is just too Scottish. The basement had tartan
wallpaper. A lot of golf things. It was like an Edinburgh gift shop.
Justin: We rate decorating ability on a scale of one to 100—one being the worst
and 100 being the best—and these people, they were a negative one.
How much do you consider the taste or design inclinations of the homeowners?
Colin: We always listen to our homeowners and look at where they live.
We try to rehabilitate them, as well.
Justin: We’re on a mission of decorative beautification and will not stop until
we’ve waved our glamour wands in front of every country in the world.
We did Scotland, France, Italy, Spain and England, and now we’re here in Canada.
And thank God we got here. Some of the things we’re seeing, the dank
basements, the hockey-themed living rooms, the bedrooms so of another
era they have candlewick bedspreads…
Where are you living?
Colin: We just bought a condo at Concord Cityplace. It was hideous.
A bachelor pad with brown walls, brown carpet, brown kitchen.
Brown, brown, brown—it was like a bear’s bottom.
Justin: It’s been decorated by some delinquent middle-aged man, but the view is incredible. It’s on the top floor, 39.
Colin: Justin was obsessed with seeing the CN Tower.
Do you have any interest in taking advantage of our marriage laws?
Justin: I think I do, actually.
Colin: What? I don’t know if he’s the right one yet. After 21 years, I’m not sure.
We’re slow burners in our family.
Justin: I like the fact that everyone here is so low-key. Nobody makes a fuss.
TEST Originally published October 2007
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