The dinner party last May was as traditional an affair as any at the Windsor home of Elton John and David Furnish could be. The meal was served at their simple dark walnut dining table. When the dishes were cleared, Elton pulled out a small black-velvet box. Getting down on one knee, he quietly asked the question, “Will you be my life partner?” “But I already am,” Furnish responded, shocked. After all, they have been partners since meeting nearly 12 years ago. Then, eyeing the white-gold and diamond-studded eternity band, he gave his answer. Looking on—and tearing up—were the dinner guests, chosen by Elton to witness the spectacle: Furnish’s mother and father, and Jake Shears and Scott “Babydaddy” Hoffman from the gay-glam band Scissor Sisters.

Six months later, 600 invitations had been sent out for the December 21st nuptials of Elton John and Toronto native David Furnish. And most of the reply cards—from the likes of Sting, Sharon Stone, Sir Michael Caine, Donatella Versace and Joss Stone—had come back in the affirmative. Tailors were consulted (Dior’s Hedi Slimane for Furnish, Yohji Yamamoto for Elton) and the reception venue chosen (Woodside, the couple’s Windsor estate). But, frighteningly for a wedding (or civil union, in British law) of this size and profile—more talked about than that other Windsor wedding (Charles and Camilla’s) last spring—the planning had barely begun.

With only four weeks to go before the big day, some brides would panic and call in the pros. But Furnish, with his easy Canadian smile, bespoke suit and a Rolodex even the Queen would envy, is a pro. He is one half of possibly the most successful event-organizing team the U.K. has ever seen. Together, he and Elton have thrown seven consecutive White Tie & Tiara Balls, raising funds for the Elton John AIDS Foundation. The most recent ball, last July, featured zebras and giraffes; performance artists in gorilla suits; a celebrity bonanza that included a scandal-making Moss, a supreme Ross and two Beckhams; and an auction that raised £930,000 ($2.14 million). It was all, rather seriously, in a day’s work for Furnish, who’s become such a force in the top echelons of society that even Bill Clinton sent him a recorded message of congratulations before the wedding.

“That David was gay didn't faze them. But Elton John? My parents had to wrap their heads around that.”

Though he’s still able to, as he says, buy a sandwich without stopping traffic, Furnish attracts media curiosity with every public move. Like the time he and Elton performed an intervention on a wired Robbie Williams in Windsor. Or when he cornered Boy George in a bathroom stall after the singer publicly slagged Elton for recording a duet with the popular boy band Blue to help save his waning career. It is a reality about which Furnish is not always enthusiastic. “The Daily Mail has it out for us,” says Furnish. “Seven weeks before the wedding, it said that we were planning on having Victoria Beckham and Elizabeth Hurley as bridesmaids—and we hadn’t even planned it.” (While Beckham was reported to have told Roberto Cavalli, designer of the scarlet dress she wore to the wedding reception, that she was “the centre of attention all night,” neither she nor Hurley stood up for the couple.)

Furnish’s defence reflex is deployed reluctantly. At 43, the younger of the two by 15 years, he feels compelled to protect the safe environment Elton has built for himself over the last four decades. He’s a rare dove in the wicked food chain of the entertainment biz, with a dashing manner and good looks that, I’m told, he has come by honestly. But though he may seem to some like a gatecrasher, Furnish has made the rounds like a seasoned veteran. He is the musical inspiration, the deciding vote and, since their civil union, heir to Elton’s estimated £180 million ($382 million) fortune. In terms of his influence, David Furnish is not to be underestimated.

Not every day is as photogenic as Elton’s 50th birthday was in 1997—when he wore a Sun King wig so tall they had to take a moving van to the venue—but they are certainly sun kissed, designer dressed and expensively highlighted. When I arrive at the couple’s London home on a typical Wednesday, I feel like Little Orphan Annie alighting at the Warbucks mansion, swarmed by staff (though Furnish, in top-to-toe Dior, takes my coat) and offered a drink more times than I can record. One housekeeper fluffs the sofa cushions at 15-minute intervals. Two decorators hang a new series of artworks by the entrance to the kitchen. Dennis, Elton and Furnish’s 10-year-old border terrier, wanders in an elderly stupor. Couriers bring in packages. There’s even a child crying somewhere (a housekeeper’s daughter). Elton isn’t home—he’s just left New York, where he was performing at the Country Music Awards with Dolly Parton, for their mansion in Atlanta—but you can see his touch in a Victorian-era taxidermic cat housed in a bell jar (“Sharon Osbourne named her Puss,” says Furnish), in the oversized glass corncob by master craftsman William Morris, and in the note he’s left for his fiancé on the kitchen counter (“Dawling, I miss you so much—hurry up!”). Not a piano in sight, however: Elton hates playing outside the studio.