Toronto’s in the middle of a walloping flu season. After last year’s swine flu pandemic that wasn’t, the city seems to have let down its guard. A higher-than-usual number of people went without a flu shot this year, and now many are paying the price in phlegm.
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“Complacency” to blame for Toronto’s overwhelming number of flu cases
Paula Deen hit by flying ham, Moscow’s favourite vodka comes to Canada, cooking up Margaret Atwood’s The Year of the Flood
• The ever-upbeat Paula Deen was unaware that she was in a game of catch when someone tossed a ham in her direction, accidentally hitting her in the face. Deen was helping to unload donated meat at an Atlanta food bank on Monday when she tossed the pork to a gentleman, then turned away, not expecting that when the man said “Back atcha,” he meant it. Despite fears of a busted lip, Deen walked away from the incident injury-free, quipping, “I haven’t met the ham that could stop me yet!” [AP]
• Moscow’s most popular vodka, Russian Standard, hits the Canadian market this week. Purportedly based on a formula by chemist Dmitri Mendeleev (the man who invented the periodic table), the grain-based spirit is distilled four times and has a balanced, bready taste. At roughly half the price of Grey Goose, it will have recession-wary boozers stockpiling bottles from the LCBO. [Globe and Mail]
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Chocolate inhalers, the science of wine pairing, debunking swine flu food claims

Suck it, chocolate lovers
• A new inhaler that allows users to taste chocolate without chewing or eating has struck a chord with consumers, having sold out in its first month. The French product known as Le Whif puffs micro-particles of chocolate into the imbiber’s mouth. Inventors say that inhaled chocolate is just the beginning, making us hopeful that a bacon inhaler is on the horizon. Le Whif should be available in North America by 2010. [Reuters]
• CBS interviews Jonathan Safran Foer, the author of Everything Is Illuminated and a new non-fiction book, Eating Animals. Here, he discusses factory farming and the importance of re-examining the way we eat. In writing the book, he found that “misery is built into the system” of factory farming, and that changing the system will require people to eat much less meat. [CBS]
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Will Canada be offering the same H1N1-combatting nasal spray they have in the States? It seems preferable to a shot.
The spray you’re referring to is widely distributed in the United States (more than 5.5 million doses had been sent out by mid-October). But, like over-the-counter AK‑47s and In-N-Out Burgers, you can only get it south of the 49th. Before you sigh audibly, the flu mist has its downsides: it’s FDA-approved only for people aged two to 49, and it’s not recommended for pregnant women or anyone afflicted with such conditions as asthma, diabetes and lung disease. Given the recent CDC report that indicated more than half of severe swine sufferers were patients with pre-existing ailments, it looks like those who need protection most would be SOL if they wanted to take it up the snout. A needle prick is certainly more painful than a nasal spray, but it’s still the best way to ensure a swine-free citizenry.
• Question from Bobby Colangelo in Woodbridge
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Tom Ford will design for women again, faux-hawks for babies, designers ditch Toronto fashion week
• Sure, swine flu is going around, but that’s no reason to be impolite. As fashion week presses on, Torontonians continue to embrace the oh-so-European double-cheek kiss as their preferred greeting. May we suggest Cold FX? [Toronto Star]
• Tom Ford has confirmed he will be creating a line of womenswear for his eponymous label. Cue sighs from everyone who thinks Gucci hasn’t been the same without the dreamy designer. Ford is waiting for financing before launching, but some sources say the line could be ready as early as fall 2010. [WWD]
• We’ve already got babies in Che Guevara tees, Uggs and Canada Goose jackets, and now we’ll be able to artfully faux-hawk their hair thanks to Le Baby Hair Gel. Free of such irritants as fragrance and parabens, the gel is safe to use on baby scalps, and perfect for taming annoying frizzies and fly-aways. [Bella Sugar]
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I read that Ontario has a surplus of pigs. Can I adopt one as a pet?
Interest in pigs as pets surged recently when a crate of orphaned oinkers was dropped at Dalton McGuinty’s office, along with a sign reading “Due to misnaming an influenza ‘Swine Flu,’ our industry has been devastated…” The anonymous piglet abandoner is referring to record losses recently experienced by Ontario’s 2,767 hog farmers. A year ago, pork was the mainstay of every bistro worth its fleur de sel, but H1N1 has curbed our appetite for all things swiney. Unfortunately, city dwellers are barred from taking in the little trotters. Back in the mid-’90s, pigs were the pet par excellence, thanks in part to George Clooney and his pot-bellied companion (RIP Max Clooney, 1988–2006). Yet many Clooney wannabes didn’t account for the fact that their chihuahua-size friend would grow to exceed 150 pounds, relentlessly uproot lawns and pee more often than a kid on a road trip. The rejected pets ended up on foster farms, and in 1998 Toronto’s newly amalgamated Animal Services put the kibosh on domesticated porkers (also banned: anteaters, elephants and mongooses). If a Wilbur to call your own is still too much to resist, it could be time to consider greener pastures. Persons living in any of Toronto’s designated agricultural areas (Riverdale Farm, for example) are free to go hog wild.
• Question from Dave Kimball, Yorkdale
Wondering about the waterfront? Curious about construction? Perplexed by politics? Ask the Urban Decoder a question here.
Toronto’s Best Dressed: Roslyn Griffith Hall
In a sea of similarly dressed socialites at the launch party for the revamped Teatro Verde store in Yorkville, we came across fashion stylist Roslyn Griffith Hall, who nailed recession chic in a denim jumpsuit from The Gap. Here, her take on why less is not necessarily more and her not-so-secret connection to Ben Mulroney’s blazers.

(Photo by Emer Connon)
There’s a lot going on in that outfit. Are you a more-is-more kind of person?
Sure. For me, it’s all about the mood I’m in. I’ve been wearing this hat for years, and since I started designing jewellery, I tend to wear a lot of it.
What about the gloves? Are those a nod to fashion or a nod to swine flu?
I’ve been wearing gloves forever, so it’s not because of swine flu. They’re like a second skin. Whenever Holts gets new gloves, I buy out the size sevens.
Is there a particular designer you are loving these days?
Haider Ackermann. He’s all about sexy rock ’n’ roll, but with class. His pieces are expensive but amazing.
What kind of styling do you do?
For years, I was doing everyone on Canadian Idol, but now that’s on a break, so I’m working on my jewellery line.
Are you telling us that you’re the woman behind Ben Mulroney’s blazers?
Yes. I chose all of Ben’s suits for Idol, and I dressed him recently for the Innovators’ Ball.
What about the tan?
I didn’t have anything to do with the tan, but I did do his pocket squares.
Final question: are you planning to leave the sunglasses on all night?
Yeah. I guess you could say they’re the new eye makeup.
Dalton McGuinty hams it up

Riot police look on as Tamil protestors demonstrate at Queen's Park (Photos by Karon Liu)
The provincial government hosted a photo-op luncheon at Queen’s Park this afternoon, complete with Dalton McGuinty robotically slinging the province’s pork products. “They’re nutritious and delicious!” he said, attempting to calm anxieties over swine flu transmission via meat. Anxiety of a different kind, however, was running high on the legislative lawn, where pro-Tamil protests and hunger strikes continued.
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Obama is pro-mustard, Ontario is pro-booze and Canada is pro-pork
• Last Tuesday, President Obama took a moment for a bite at Ray’s Hell Burger in Arlington, Virginia. Fox News “journalist” Sean Hannity cast the president’s request for dijon mustard as elitist. This video clip proves we’re not joking. [Gawker]
• Some headway has been made in reversing an Ontario law that prohibits the carrying of alcohol over provincial borders and the purchasing of wine directly from out-of-province wineries. [Globe and Mail]
• Despite the World Health Organization’s warnings about swine flu in pork, the Canadian government insists the meat is safe to eat. Still, we don’t imagine Canadians will be stocking up on chops any time soon. [CP]
• In the first quarter of 2009, the American fast-food industry recorded its first decline since 2003. Perhaps there’s an upside to the recession, after all. [Reuters]
A $75,000 recipe, China’s “illegal” pork ban, and Meryl’s Julia Child impression
• To brighten up this Wednesday morning, here’s Meryl Streep doing an awesome Julia Child impression for the upcoming movie Julie and Julia. This almost makes up for Mamma Mia! Almost. [YouTube]
• Loblaws’ profit increased by a whopping 73 per cent in the first quarter of 2009, meaning the grocery giant made $109 million in the last three months alone. Somewhere, Galen Weston is celebrating with some non-PC brand wine. [CP]
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Elderly etiquette, Parkdale Potluck, and pork barriers continue to go up
• When dining at a restaurant, senior citizens don’t like to be referred to as “guys,” would like to have a glass of water right away, and would like all their cutlery laid out immediately. This according to curmudgeon Don Crossley, whose 900-word gripe also recommends portion sizes and serving tips. [Burlington Post]







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